


nothing's gonna hurt you baby

by natshana



Category: Power Rangers, Power Rangers (2017)
Genre: Bisexual Kimberly, F/F, based off the deleted clip, coffeeshops and donuts, kimberlys super gay for trini, protective trini
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-16
Updated: 2017-09-23
Packaged: 2018-11-14 17:04:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11212413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/natshana/pseuds/natshana
Summary: There were several things about Trini that Kim questioned. Like how she insisted on only taking trips up to her rock after the sun started to set at eight, or how she could only drink Dr. Pepper from the corner market between her house and Billy's. Or, and this is her favorite, how Trini would start to giggle and have the dopiest smile on her lips after her second glass of whatever concoction Zack had brought to their bonfire.Or a quick one-shot based off the deleted scene that totally should have been in the movie. Featuring protective Trini and smitten Kimberly(i lied it's turned into more than a one-shot)





	1. Strawberry Milkshakes

**Author's Note:**

> this was supposed to be a one shot oops
> 
> (ALSO I HAVENT GIVEN UP ON CITT, I finally finished the school year and can write again and I got this idea in my head from the newly released clip so fight me)

There were several things about Trini that Kim questioned. Like how she insisted on only taking trips up to her rock after the sun started to set at eight, or how she could only drink Dr. Pepper from the corner market between her house and Billy's. Or, and this is her favorite, how Trini would start to giggle and have the dopiest smile on her lips after her second glass of whatever concoction Zach had brought to their bonfire.

 

It was in this state that suddenly the girl's hands wouldn't be able to leave her alone as well. If it were the tugging of her shirt sleeve or the gentle trace of patterns along Kim’s thigh. Trini’s fingers never seemed to be more than an inch or two away at all times during these quiet nights, basked in the warmth of a — most likely — bigger than acceptable fire, and surrounded by kind faces and peaceful smiles. (No matter how lopsided most of them were.)

 

And maybe it was this side of Trini that had Kim’s heart racing the fastest and her thoughts tumbling down slopes she didn't know if she was ready to accept yet. It was also the side that made her skin buzz and teeth shine through stretched lips, which had her smiles forming one after the other with no intent to stop.

 

Because you see, Kim was absolutely smitten with the Yellow Ranger, who only tied her shoelaces after arriving to first period, who would sometimes forget to comb through the single patch of hair on the back of her head, and who, on occasion, would cling to her side like some over-adapted koala after having one too many drinks.

 

Making her bed sheets smell like cheap booze and Old Spice deodorant.

 

Correction. Making her bed sheets smell like the undeniable scent of Trini.

 

And ultimately, out of all the things that truly stumped her, she couldn't think of a single _bad_ thing that defined Trini. Sure there were flaws and annoying little quirks, but nothing that made Kim change her mindset of finding Trini to be completely adorable.

 

Which is a mindset that she had been trying to forget for the past two weeks, or at least ever since the incident which had the small glances she spared Trini become longing stares.

 

Because honestly.

 

Who even did that?

 

(She did.)

 

~

 

Whoever came up with the phrase that entailed words couldn't hurt as bad as a rock or some piece of wood was a fucking liar.

 

They hurt worse.

 

And not in the physical sense that one would compare to a wound or injury. Kimberly could take pain, she could withstand it and inflict it.

 

Hell, she knocked a guy's tooth out for fuck’s sake.

 

(They put it back, though.)

 

But words — and not just words, because that's not what was troubling her, it was the sideways glances, and the whispers, and the small shoves and the _lack_ of words that were clawing at her skin and digging its way into her veins and making a home inside of her gut.

 

She couldn't walk down the hall without out wanting to tear her hair out or scream.

 

And the worst part was.

 

She _deserved_ it.

 

Everything that was being thrown her way was well earned and deserving because what she had done was _absolutely_ fucked up and there was nothing she could say or do to make up for it. No words could heal the wounds she inflicted or seal the bonds she had ripped apart.

 

Kimberly had _fucked_ up, and she knew it. But no one else did.

 

They still thought of her as a cold hearted bitch and who was to blame them?

 

Well — not everyone.

 

Not the group of Rangers who she had come to call family. Not the sweet smiled boy who helped fix her bike in his garage when she crashed it into a telephone box after the stars had shown above her head and suddenly the path before her was unclear. Not the arrogant and hotheaded kid who slid her cans of cheap, gas station beer during their weekly bonfires, and definitely not the wise minded, ex-athlete who walked her home every afternoon when everything around her became just slightly too much.

 

Not the girl who's standing beside her with a look that could drop Kim to her knees and an entire locker door hanging from her grip.

 

It's metal exterior littered in messily scrawled insults and phrases which had been running through her head like a stampede of wildebeests. Taking her heart and soul and even her nonexistent feline father with them.

 

Kimberley's breath caught in her throat as her mind finally uncluttered and her eyes traced from twisted metal to slim curled fingers, along a tan and toned arm until finally resting on a face which held a confusing mix of concern and hatred.

 

“Take your stuff out.”

 

She stuttered for a second at the quick quip, eyes flickering from the few piles of books and bag that sat in the now defenseless confine.

 

“What?”

 

“Take it,” she watched as Trini's head gestured toward the filled locker once again and couldn't help but stand in awe at how the white light filtering in through the windows behind them perfectly framed the girl's face.

 

What the _fuck?_

 

Kim blinked, once. Twice. Before plunging her hand in to grab the two neatly organized textbooks and shoving them into her small bag which she had withdrawn using her other hand.

 

Trini watched, the door now slightly lower than where it had hung earlier, her grasp loosening, as Kim quickly zipped up her bag and threw it over her shoulder. She gave Trini a dubious look as her grip tightened around the now secure strap and she tucked her jacket into her chest.

 

Her heart had started to pound ever since Trini jumped into her view and she wasn't sure what to make of that or the whole situation entirely. All she knew was that Trini was giving her a tight-lipped smile and was holding the piece of crap which had been haunting her thoughts.

 

The piece of crap which Trini had _pulled_ from its hinges — and if her shortened breath and twisting stomach weren't enough, Kim could tell that she was _definitely_ turned on right now.

 

What. The. _Fuck._

 

And it was in that moment, those three seconds of quiet before a loud tearing of metal seemed to echo down the hallway, that she realized something she didn't think she would ever forget.

 

That Trini Kwan had the most gorgeous set of dark chocolate eyes and she couldn't help but picture the hand still curled around her old locker door curling around something else of hers.

 

With her jacket still tucked close to her stomach, Trini nodded and set off down the empty hallway, leaving Kim to scramble after her.

 

The situation was surreal if she was being honest with herself.

 

For the fact that the halls were strangely clear of any other bodies and the light filtering in through the windows was _way_ too bright and white and she could hear her sneakers squeaking down the tiled floors and there was a girl only feet before her wearing a shit-eating smirk and holding something that was plaguing her ever going existence.

 

And Kimberley was completely and utterly _fucked_.

 

And Trini had pulled her _locker door_ off of its hinges because she couldn't help but see the light fade from Kim's eyes every afternoon she came to retrieve her stuff.

 

So when Kim glanced at Trini once more and watched her throw the door into some poor teachers classroom with as much force to tear through a wall, she couldn't help but break into a laugh and chase after the now sprinting body before her.

 

Because honestly.

 

She didn't really need a locker, did she?

 

~

 

Kim’s parents made her get a job two weeks after Rita had most nearly destroyed the entire town and ultimately, the world.

 

Something about learning responsibility and managing her time with school and what was she supposed to say against it?

 

_Hey, Mom — Dad — I don't really have time to hold a job while I'm trying to save our universe from utter destruction with the help of four outcast teenagers and a giant head from the prehistoric era who talks from a wall._

 

_Oh, and did I mention I have powers now?_

 

Yeah, no.

 

So, she agreed with a fake smile and overzealous attitude until she got hired at the local coffee place that neighbored the now newly refurbished Krispy Kreme.

 

Cause irony, right?

 

It wasn't all so bad, though. The hours were long but easy, the people were nice and the owners were never around so there was really nothing she could do wrong as long as she put out the right order with a toothy grin and sometimes a too flirty quip that landed a couple extra dollars in her tip jar.

 

Surprisingly she still found time to train on the weekends and after work on occasions. Especially on the days when the rush had just been too big and the customers a little too rude and the only way she could release any of the pent up aggression was by throwing a few Putties around the pit.

 

Her parents never questioned the later hours or the bruises or cuts. As long as she got perfect grades and held her shift at the shop and didn't make a show of herself, they were content, and so was she.

 

Working had a few benefits as well.

 

Like the free coffee (cause who wouldn't enjoy that?), and the extra pocket money every week and the visits from Billy after his daily stop at the donut place next door.

 

But the thing the always made her day complete was when a short, brunette haired girl would waltz in at six on the dot and order nothing but Kim’s smile.

 

It was a running joke between them that may have seemed funny and casual at first, but now every time the phrase left the girl’s lips, Kim can't help but feel her heart flutter and chest tighten. And so what if her fingertips begin to buzz and the heat beneath them no longer seems uncomfortable? She would die to see the smile that aligns Trini's face every day she walks through the door and catches her eyes.

 

~

 

Ever since a single locker in the Junior’s hallway of Angel Grove High School had suddenly become absent of a metal door, Trini had been stuck to Kim's hip like glue.

 

(Not that she was complaining.)

 

It was like suddenly, Trini was everywhere.

 

Kim’s quick walk between classes, where she tried to ignore the stares and whispers, was now accompanied by a quiet presence and shy smile. The seat next to her in biology was no longer lonely, nor empty. And her single shift at the cafe was always kept company with the shorter girl, swinging her legs from the counter which she sat, quietly chatting away.

 

That day seemed to shift their relationship from mere acquaintances, or partners, to something more along the lines of friendship. Her stressful and lonesome days were no longer so dreary, as she now had a fond smile to look forward to every morning and evening.

 

Kim can barely remember the days when she used to play sick so she wouldn't have to go to school and face the guilt and sickening stares. After only a couple months of her new schedule with Trini, those days seemed farther and farther behind her.

 

So much so, that when winter break came and ended, she couldn't think of a time when she had been happier.

 

Without Kim noticing, a small smile had found its place resting on her lips as she dried out the silver shaker she had just used to make someone's iced coffee. Her quiet demeanor not going overlooked as the butt end of a slightly crumpled, straw wrapper hit Kim on the right side of her forehead. Making her jump and watch the garbage fall to the floor before glaring at its marksman.

 

“I'm gonna stop coming if you're just going to stand there all broody and quiet,” Trini smirked from her signature place, sitting on the empty counter near the espresso machine. It's surface never being used except by her co-workers on their shifts.

 

“I am _not_ broody,” Kim smiled into the cup, fully knowing that her cheeks were on fire as she finished and set the appliance next to the shelf of syrups.

 

She could feel the eyes of the Yellow Ranger behind her and turned her head over her shoulder to catch sight of a knowing smirk. Trini's legs were crossed on the counter as she bit down on the plastic straw with eyebrows raised.

 

“Shut up,” Kim grumbled, turning away from the girl who had started to drink the milkshake she had made her only minutes ago. Her mind going to places she did not deem fit for a work environment, if not for the sight of Trini's lips curling around the slick, transparent straw.

 

This is how most days went for them, keeping each other company while Kim worked her shift. Supplying Trini’s fill of beverages which the girl rumored only Kimberly herself could make perfectly. From strawberry milkshakes to a cup of cocoa, if someone was working with Kim one day then they weren't allowed to touch anything that landed in the Yellow Ranger's hands.

 

Kim felt herself smiling again as she leaned back against the counter to watch Trini after having cleaned all the dishes and wiped down her station. The place was quiet today, being almost seven at night, not many people were looking for an energy boost.

 

Trini was wearing her usual getup, except today her jacket was hung up in the back and Kim kept having to draw her eyes from the exposed skin of toned arms and golden shoulders beneath a loose yellow tank top. The Yellow Ranger’s bracelets clinked together lightly when she tried to get the last drop from the bottom of the clear cup, the loud bubbling noises filling the quiet space and lifting Kimberly’s heart to her throat at the easy peace of it all.

 

Trini caught her stare mid gulp and smiled, not saying much besides gentling the gleam of her eyes and loosening the tautness of her shoulders.

 

That seemed to be another thing the two girls had begun sharing since their hangouts became more frequent. Quiet moments and longing gazes that neither really knew what to make of, only that both of them were smiling and the air around them was nice and there wasn't always a need for words.

 

Just an understanding.

 

An acceptance if you will.

 

That they were there for each other, and neither were leaving anytime soon.

 

It was a nice thing to hold on to as both of them continued with the evening. A chimerical grounding point that both could carry whenever they wanted and wherever they were.

 

Kim had never felt that with anyone she’d ever met before.

 

She didn't think she ever would.

 

~

 

Two weeks after losing access to a locker on the grounds of school, Kimberly caught sight of a brunette flaunting Trini's yellow jacket, heading down the stairway towards detention.

 

Just moments before the sighting, as she had been packing up her things in English to go to the same destination, her teacher had stopped her and brought news of the cancellation of her own month-long detention sentence.

 

The same sentence she had been complaining lightly about with Trini only the day before during training. Short clips of fragmented statements between thrown punches and calculated stances, describing the unfair punishment as the school had no way of pinning the locker incident on her. Only that because it was her locker, and there was nobody who had witnessed the happening, she had to pay for the damage to school property.

 

It seemed as though her education system didn't quite grasp the concept of how punishments should happen, though she didn't argue.

 

But now, after having thought that the school board had pulled their heads out of their asses and realized the dumb decision they had made, she saw Trini heading to the very place of altercation.

 

Not once had the girl said a thing about getting a slip so, with a furrowed brow, Kim quickly descended the stairs after her. Catching the Yellow Rangers elbow in her hand before the girl crossed the threshold and pulling her away, up against the wall of the hallway.

 

(It may have been a bit too abruptly but Kim wasn't really thinking about that as she had quickly tried to catch the retreating girl.)

 

Trini uttered the gentlest sequel of surprise when her back met the waxy brick wall and Kimberly didn't think she had ever heard anything cuter.

 

“Kim?”

 

She watched the initial fear fade from the girl’s eyes and her stomach dropped at the fact that she hadn't been thinking. Kim stepped back quickly, leaving room for Trini to breath and couldn't help but look from the light scars running along the girl's neck from her dispute with Rita to confused chocolate irises.

 

Trini never talked about it but Kim knew she didn't take it lightly. The newly formed, skittish behavior and tired looking eyes and abrasive demeanor spoke volumes to the Pink Ranger but she wouldn't push the subject until Trini was ready to come to her about it.

 

And when she was, Kimberly was more than willing to listen and help.

 

“What are you doing? I didn't know you had detention.” She got straight to the point, cocking her head to the side and studying Trini’s apprehensive stance.

 

Her face looked almost guilty.

 

“I cussed out Hennemann in Psych, guess I forgot to text you.” Trini shrugged and wouldn't meet her eyes. Her tone was sharp and defensive and it would have hurt if Kimberly didn't know the girl enough.

 

She hated it when Trini got like this, but there was nothing she could do to get her out of it, sometimes the girl just got into moods.

 

Doesn't mean it still didn't sting and that she didn't wish she could pull her out of it.

 

“Alright,” Kim relaxed, her shoulders had tensed up and forehead creased in worry. Or was it concern? She didn't know. “I guess I'll see you after, then?”

 

Trini nodded, eyes still looking at the floor and back still resting against the wall until she kicked off and turned to walk into the waiting classroom.

 

Kimberly watched her all the way and couldn't help but feel helpless.

 

The girl she was slowly gathering feelings for was nothing short of a switch. She never knew what side she would get, and most of the time it was the playful but reserved Trini, who held small smiles and lit up Kim’s insides like a Christmas Eve fire.

 

Sometimes though, she was faced with this.

 

And she didn't know what to do.

 

Only stop, and stare, and try to help. Try to get a small smile from the girl's lips.

 

But Trini was a live wire, and Kimberly was slowly finding her way around it.

 

She just needed time.


	2. Apollo 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Music suggestion while reading
> 
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4sbDxR22z4&list=PLa9a2NfPK2LZfbbAqbqPFNyaEhq4FqcVg

The first time Kim witnessed Trini drink, she was truly captivated.

She watched the decade-old walls surrounding the shorter girl crumble, her smile become looser and her eyes become softer.

She watched her joke with Billy and flirt with Zack and wink at Jason from across the fire.

She watched her shoulders slump and her defensive demeanor fade until she was nothing less than a bubbly mess. Kim never would have guessed that Trini would be a light-weight, but she totally was and Kim was eating it up entirely.

The first time Trini sat next to her while they had gathered for their weekly fire, where Zack had withdrawn half a bottle of Captain Morgan Rum and Billy a six-pack of tiny blue Gatorades, did she see — and feel — a side of Trini that she never wanted to forget.

Everything about that night seemed to happen in slow motion. As the alcohol flowed down her throat and stilted her movements and thoughts. Everything sort of became hazy, and warm, and nice.

Everything, until her mind caught sight of Trini once more and in her confusing state, she couldn't look at anything else.

Could only watch as every statement leaving the Yellow Ranger’s lips was directed towards her, whether it was she who asked the question or someone else.

Could only watch as their bodies shifted closer on the log until Trini was way too close to be friendly. Leaning over into her space so that she could smell the sharpness of liquor on her breath and see the languid film lining her eyes.

She was stuck as she watched Trini's hands cross the already broken boundary, trailing her fingers down Kim's arm, tangling and untangling their fingers in a playful manner. Whispering nonsense into her ear as gentle fingers would trace along the seams of her jeans.

If Kim hadn't been so disoriented already with the liquid poison lining her veins, she's pretty sure she would have died right then and there.

And that's how that night continued, too. Along with every night after that.

With Trini clinging to her side, and when all the fun was over, her day would end with a half-asleep head on her shoulder and a warm body curled under her arm.

And every night, said body wouldn't move a muscle, causing Kim to lift her up and carry her home. And every night she would fall asleep with Trini's head on her chest and a stomach full of alcohol.

And every morning, Kim would wake to empty sheets and convince herself the night before had been nothing but a hazy dream.

(The only problem with that was her sheets always smelling like Old Spice.)

~

Kimberly tried.

She really did.

But the curiosity was aching at her fingertips and it was as if the soles of her feet were burning holes in her shoes.

As much as she loved — wait, no, adored? Liked? Whatever — Trini, she still didn't believe the half constructed statement that had left her lips earlier in the day.

Trini was tough, she knew that, and hot-headed and strong and had a sharp and quick tongue and had a really nice jawline and her hair was — Trini was Trini. But even that didn't convince her that the girl had randomly cussed out her favorite teacher for no apparent reason at all.

So, now she was back at the school, after having finished her shift and had gotten nothing but complacency from the girl in question. Misdirected statements and guilty expressions are what filled her time while she made other people’s orders. And that, was what really convinced her to come back and talk to the principle about what was up.

She would get her answers, no matter what it took.

Kim just had to throw a smile or two and she knew she could get what she needed.

 

 

 

“You broke, a chair?!”

Trini startled for the second time that night.

The first being when Kim had quickly burst through the girl’s open window, causing Trini to jump and tumble off the other end of her bed. Quickly catching her following laptop with speed no other person would understand besides Kim and their three other Rangers.

Kimberly ignored the glare that popped up from behind tossed covers and marched straight towards the girl. Well, to the other end of the bed because all she could see was the top half of Trini's head and a piercing gaze that was fading, a lot like a child who had gotten in trouble.

And when the sentence was half yelled, half whispered from her lips, she once again saw guilt pass over Trini’s face. But not really guilt, more like shame or the fear of doing something wrong.

She stopped before her knees bumped into the bed frame and crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for any kind of response from the Yellow Ranger still on the floor.

When she realized she wasn't going to get one, Kimberly huffed, her anger fading only slightly at the innocent girl. “Well?”

“What do you want me to say?” Trini didn't move, besides sliding her computer back onto the bed and avoiding all of Kimberly’s attempts at making eye contact. “I'm not going to deny it.”

“I wasn't asking if you did it or not, I know you did, I saw the chair,” she could see Trini cringe, the girl’s fingers curling into a fist and her eyes squinting, if just for a second. “I just want an explanation.”

“An explanation?” Trini finally looked up at her then and Kim had to mentally stop herself from taking a step back at the intensity of the other Ranger’s eyes.

“Yeah,” her anger had dissolved completely at the rising of Trini's, so the word was as loud as a pin drop in the quiet tension they had created.

“An explanation?” Trini, scoffed, at that — was she laughing? — , “Do you want me to explain why I broke the chair? Or do you want me to explain why I had to prove to the school board that I was the one who broke your locker because apparently I seemed too small?”

The girl finally lifted herself off the floor and Kim audibly swallowed, uneasiness settling in her gut as Trini walked around the bed with an unreadable expression.

“Or maybe,” the Yellow Ranger paused when the two had come toe to toe. Trini’s feet hidden in calf-high, black socks that covered most of the exposed skin below her gray, boxer shorts. “You're still curious about why I did it in the first place, why I broke the door, why I couldn't stand seeing your face fall every time you looked at the damn thing or why-" 

Trini looked at her again and Kim didn't know what to make of it, what to make of the jumbled mess of expressions crossing the shorter girl's face. 

“Why I have to hold myself back — from punching in every kid’s face that even looks sideways at you.” Her voice had gotten softer until the room was filled with nothing but silence and the steady intakes and outtakes of their breaths.

Trini looked at her as if she was holding every possible answer on her shoulders while at the same time looking as if she wanted to strangle something.

She could tell that the girl was waiting for an answer but what was she supposed to say? How was she supposed to respond to simple questions that had slowly turned into a confession of something more?

Kimberly looked between Trini's waiting eyes, which almost seemed scared of what could come out of her mouth which was ridiculous, because this girl amazing and everything at once so how could something she had to say effect that?

When almost too much time had passed for her answer to be acceptable, the light and hope in the Yellow Ranger’s eyes began to fade and Kim choked while trying to bring it back.

“Trin-”

“Don't,” the girl cut her off with a sigh and Kimberly could only watch as the walls were built back up. Brick by brick, Trini closed herself off until her left foot took a step back and the right began to follow, thick socks making her movements silent and weightless. “I'm sorry, you should go.”

“No — I,” but Trini wasn't listening, only retreating to her bed where she settled in the position Kimberly had encountered her in. And when Kim tried to take a step toward her, dark chocolate eyes lifted until they met with her's and she froze.

They were pleading.

Not asking, or demanding, or authorizing. Just pleading, hoping, asking in a way only Kimberly would give into.

So, she nodded. Held back the lump that had risen in her throat and left the way she came. 

~

Angel Grove High School, the only High School in a twenty-mile radius, had a student body of six hundred and twenty-three.

Kimberly knew this because Billy had told her one evening when they were hanging out in his garage after she had asked for help in her calculus class. 

Six hundred and twenty-three.

If that didn't shout “small town”, then she didn't know what did.

Her class alone, the senior class of 2018, containing Jason, Billy, Trini, and herself (Zack, the baby of the group, was still a Junior), made up only fifteen percent of that number.

Ninety-five kids that would be graduating in five months.

Ninety-one of them most likely moving as far away as they can to escape the desolate and unimportant lives they had created here.

But the four of them that were left could kiss any dreams they had of a future, goodbye.

Because that’s what happens when you go digging into cave walls on a late spring night in April. You become a superhuman entity that now has a duty to protect a fucking rock in the middle of nowhere.

She really should have thought this through before she accepted, not like she could’ve denied it anyways.

In the middle of the small lesson that Billy had been giving her is when they both agreed upon a break and this conversation had arose. 

Billy had wanted to become an aeronautical engineer for NASA.

Kim — Kim didn't know what she wanted to do.

All she really wanted was to get out, and now she's stuck, and so is Billy, and everyone else.

And the whole situation is so _fucked_ in a way that neither of them can help.

But Billy wanted to be an aeronautical engineer for NASA, and she doesn't even know what that means but she still cries when she rides her bike home that night.

The small rocks crunching under her tires in the starlit sky and the slight breeze carrying the loose strands of her ponytail across her face and tears streaming down her cheeks, which were drying in the cool air before they could make it anywhere.

None of them had asked for this, and now they were a part of something bigger than anybody could imagine.

And they were stuck.

(Kimberly got Billy a replica of Apollo 11 eight days later and he smiled before putting it on his shelf in his small bedroom.)

~

Trini's parents were nice — kind of.

Nice in that fake kind of way a teacher would treat their pupil. Fake smiles and laughter, used to encourage and brighten young one’s minds.

Fake in the way they held their family together, making it seem as if everything was alright.

Pretending that their children were perfect and they had the perfect jobs and owned the perfect house and attended their perfect family barbecues and volunteered when they were perfectly needed.

Because they weren't nice in the way one's parents should be, they weren't nice because they _wanted_ to be. They were nice because they wanted to seem _normal._  

Because normal families didn't have a daughter who wasn't interested in men.

Normal families didn't have a son that had to be picked up from the county's juvenile center every other Saturday.

Normal families didn't treat their children like puppets to their own story so that they could be seen as just so _perfect_ in everybody else's eyes.

Trini's parents weren't _nice_.

They were fake.

And every time Kimberly walked into their house she could feel the hair stand up on the back of her neck and could feel the _suffocation_ that the household held.

And when her feet would pass over the small lip of the doorway, her eyes couldn't help but trace over Trini's expression as well. Watching the girl's shoulders tense and her brow uncrease and her lips tighten into the fakest smile she'd ever seen and she couldn't help but feel her insides _curdle_ at the awkwardness and sadness of it all.

The thing is, that wasn't even the worst part.

It was when they were confronted with either Trini's mom or dad and she had to listen to their practiced conversations about each other's days and feel the unease slide into the room.

She had to listen to Trini call them by their first names and even if her household wasn't the best, Kim couldn't help but wish the girl had _more_.

Because she deserved more.

She deserved the world.

But she didn't have it, not even a glimpse.

So, when the two would make it past the entryway and were able to avoid the kitchen and the living room and follow their loud footsteps up the staircase and finally land in Trini's bedroom (If one would even call it that, for it seemed like her parents had just plastered on some wallpaper and made the _attic_ seem like a room when it really wasn't), did she shut the door quietly and take the Yellow Ranger into her arms.

If just to hold her and protect her from everything around them, just for a second.

Kimberly would carry Trini's burdens every night when she dropped her off after her shift. Tucking her close and integrating their breathing until both had calmed down and could form small smiles while they held each other's gaze.

Kimberly couldn’t make up all the love Trini deserved in her lifetime. But she could try.

And she would try like hell.

~ 

“Which body part do you wish you could detach and why?”

Kimberly rolled her eyes at that one and turned away to sweep up the mess of coffee grounds she had made on the floor, this was the hundredth question she had been asked in the same amount of minutes and as mad as she wanted to be, she couldn’t help but laugh at Trini’s childlike but confusing interrogation.

“My arm so that I could slap you with it for asking all these questions.” She didn't need to turn around the see the pout that had formed on the girl’s face.

Trini had been at the shop for almost an hour and a half, later than usual due to the detentions she was still serving.

The ones they still hadn't talked about since the confrontation in the Yellow Ranger's room almost three weeks ago.

After having waltzed through the cafe's glass front, Trini had plopped herself down on her counter and talked idly before finding a page on her phone full of the wildest questions one could ask another.

And that's how they found themselves, giggling like high school girls in a movie, almost an hour later.

“Alright, alright,” Kimberly shook out the dustpan into the wastebasket next to Trini, her eyes, which should have been focused on the task at hand, were instead fondly gazing upon the pleasant smile coating the shorter girl’s lips. “If peanut butter wasn’t called peanut butter, what would it be called?" 

“Really? That's the best one you could find?”

“I'm kinda running out of them, Hart. That's the best you're gonna get,” Trini stuck her tongue out and Kim shook her head, leaning against the counter with her hip brushing against the Yellow Rangers calf. 

The small graze was electrifying but neither said a word. 

Kimberly hummed, bringing one of her crossed arms up to tap a finger against her lips, pretending not to feel an intense gaze follow the action.

“Tree seed purée?”

Trini shook her head and scrunched her nose at that, which in turn caused a chuckle to arise from Kimberly’s throat. 

“Alright, Miss Peanut Queen, think you can do me one better?” Kim turned fully to face the small challenge and was surprised to find Trini suddenly leaning closer. Setting the hand still holding her phone against the counter to hold herself up as she became almost nose to nose with Kimberly. 

“Oh, I can think of several things I can do you better for.”

She had to swallow at the unexpected proximity and the fact that she could still smell the underlying hint of strawberries on Trini’s breath.

The Yellow Ranger’s lips curled into a smirk at the effect she was having on her as she leaned away. “But honestly, this question has me stumped. On to the next one?”

Kimberly nodded dumbly at the quick shift in topics, not even fully registering what had been uttered from Trini’s lips as she couldn't stop picturing what it would have felt like to lean in and close the distance.

To taste the strawberry on the shorter girl’s tongue and feel the shudder run down her spine as she took Trini's lips into her own.

Kimberly was a fucking _mess_.

And she was pretty sure that Trini knew it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god I'm not posting from my phone again. THAT TOOK FOREVER
> 
> (PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT, I LOVE TO HEAR WHAT YOU THOUGHT)
> 
> See you next time :)


	3. Silhouette

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayo, i actually got around to update

Trini liked old films.

The ones from the 1940’s and 50’s that were in black and white and sometimes color. The ones which always seemed to consist of the same old white men arguing about politics or women or both. Old films which had that grainy quality and _that_ style of acting which couldn't be mistaken for any other film type or era.

Trini ate them up like she did the cinnamon rolls at the coffee shop, and Kim didn't think there was one that the girl hadn't seen.

And because Kim liked Trini, and liked hanging out with Trini, and being with Trini and seeing Trini.

She too had to like old films.

 _Like_ might be too strong of a term.

Endured, maybe.

Yeah, that sounded better.

Because almost every night that she came rapping on the shorter girl's window, she could see Trini's curled-up form from the distance, with blankets piled above and a laptop displayed before her. Depending on the direction the girl was facing, she could sometimes see the content smile on her lips and watch as the movie reflected off her chocolate eyes.

Watching the films was one of the best ways Kim could spend time with Trini. For the girl was usually so entranced with whatever it was on screen that Kim would have to let herself in through the girl's window.

Only making her presence known when she would gently touch Trini's shoulder before running her fingers down the girl’s bicep, and in turn, receive the sweetest and widest grin known to man. An invite into the girl’s cocoon of warmth.

It was when Trini was watching these movies that she would actually allow Kim to touch her. Fully, with no boundaries besides those of friendship, but even those had been crossed on occasion. When the Yellow Ranger's focus was set on her computer, Kim was able to slip into the dark room and under the heavy covers behind her.

Was allowed to silently pull the girl into her so that Kim had a faceful of Trini's soft hair and arms carrying the girl’s solid form.

Kim never really watched the movies, their monotone sounds usually drawing her into a pleasant slumber. But when she could curl up behind Trini, and hold her closer than she ever could elsewhere, was when Kim really felt _full_.

Of love?

Maybe.

But really it was acceptance, and companionship, and _content_.

Maybe that's the real reason Trini watched those movies.

To feel content, and to feel _grounded_ for once.

~

It was late when it happened.

And cold, so fucking cold.

And infused with alcohol, because when is anything not?

But it was cold and sloppy and fast (at first), but she doesn't remember any of that.

Can't remember any of that.

Because all she can remember is Trini.

Trini, Trini, Trini, Trini…

Honestly, it was just like every other night. Just like every other bonfire they'de had, with a little too much alcohol and laughter and silly grins and the overt feeling of family.

It was just like every other night, which is what made it so _perfect_ . So much of _everything_.

Because if it could happen then, now, whenever. It could happen _always_.

That night, late into April and almost seven months after Trini had ripped open her locker and ultimately, ripped open her heart when the five of them sat peacefully around the fire after Kim's shift, is when everything began to change.

Not drastically.

Not so life-upturning.

But it, _shifted_. Kim could feel it.

She could feel Trini's gaze last a little longer and her words be a little heavier and her touches hold a little _more._

Kim wants to say that they were drunk so that she could have an excuse. So that _they_ could have an excuse.

But the reality was, that Trini had barely taken three sips of her beer that night and Kim hadn't even gazed into her cup of whiskey. Their minds and eyes and hands were dead set elsewhere than cups full of tongue-numbing waste.

To everyone else, nothing would seem out of the ordinary, with Trini tucked close to her side and their shoulders covered in one of the thick blankets they kept stored up on the cliff side. For even in late February, the winds were sharp and the air was cold enough to enlist frostbite upon open patches of skin.

But to them, to Kim, with a soft body tucked close, both incaged in a small tent of warmth, and to Trini, who was snugged safely in the arms of the Pink Ranger, everything seemed just that much brighter, just that much more _enlightened_.

The whole situation was quiet, like watching a movie with its audio muffled and distant, only the body language for which you could tell exactly how the story would play out.

How it would end.

Or at least have a pretty good guess.

There was the crackle of the fire in the center of the group, and the heavy breathing of every body around them, most too sleepy to even notice a change in the labor of air. There was the shuffle of clothing as people moved, and the faint whoosh of wind and the distant chirp of crickets, but other than that, all was still, so Kim thought nothing of anything but the girl beside her.

The trek back to Kimberly’s place was less so, _quiet_.

Trini still had an arm wrapped around Kim's waist and she could feel it burning her skin even through the thick layers of shirt and jacket. Kim’s own limb was slung around the shorter girl's shoulders. Hand unclenched and fingers occasionally brushing against the soft skin of a tan neck.

(She pretended not to notice the shiver that would rack through Trini’s body every time that happened, playing it off as the bone-chilling, night air.)

The short trip was full of giggles and misplaced steps and side bumps which would separate them for nothing more than a second. Because that's when the cold would seep into the distance between their bodies and they would cling to each other like magnets once more.

It's February, it's _cold._

To Kim, everything had seemed fine. Just like every other night except tonight, Trini’s smiles were endless, her light touches were countless and her warm skin was ever-inviting.

So, when they had finally clambered up her balcony, not wanting to jump like they could but rather attempt to _climb_ as normal people would, when their feet creaked the chipped, white, balcony floor boards, when her glass door was quickly opened with a squeal and closed with a silent click...

Did they feel it.

Kim's hands rested against the door, one against the cool glass and the other wrapped around its stark white handle, her back facing the quiet room.

Facing the shadows born from the lack of lights, from her bed and dresser and shelves, from the low hum of her heater against the wall, and ultimately, from a set of chocolate eyes that she could feel piercing the skin along her shoulders and neck.

With the closing of her glass door, she could see the faint reflection of the girl behind her, and she could feel the change in atmosphere around them.

Because now it was real.

Now it was just them.

And she wasn't sure if she was ready to face the faint silhouette of the figure who had come to haunt her everyday thoughts.

And is _haunt_ even the right word? In the context, it's correct, a manifestation of an idea, a thought. An ever present figure that she can't seem to rid of.

But in her mind, haunting portrays to something unwanted. Something to be feared or something that has no place being there.

And, _oh_ , did she want her there.

So, if Kim were to really dwell on it, really think about it and categorize it and keep her thoughts in line so they all fit together like puzzle pieces.

She would guess that Trini’s being, her soul, her character, _frequented_ her mind more than anything else.

And she really wasn't sure if she was ready to turn and allow that idealism to become a reality.

Kim's hand was starting to grow numb against the cool glass, the only barrier between a cozy, warm room and the frigid tundra of wind. The socially acceptable amount of time for her to stand there was quickly reaching its limit, it may have even tipped over the edge and plummeted further than she could imagine because what kind of concept was time anyway?

But at last, she broke free of her trance, the one started by her own insecurities and anxiousness. Kim turned until her hand slipped away from the glass and her front now faced where her back did and her eyes locked onto a set of eyes so dark she wasn't even sure what color they were anymore.

And the air was suffocating.

But that was because it was as if there was too much of it instead of not enough.

And slowly she was regaining feeling in the hand which had been pressed against the door.

And she felt her tongue help ease her parted and dry lips before her throat began working again and her whispers would break the eerily calm yet cozy space between them.

“I feel like shit,” Trini blinked, and suddenly Kim could hear her shallow breathing, “after that tumble we just had,” her hand tightened into a thumb which she threw over her shoulder to symbolize the direction in which they came. Her eyes widened at the gesture which for some reason, in this mood, in this situation, felt out of place so she shifted her eyes away from the dark ones in front of her.

And then it was _uncomfortable_.

“And I'm sure you do, too. So you can have the shower first. If you want.” Kim was breathing hard now, not loudly, but enough that it had her blood racing and she just wanted _out_.

Because _what_ the _hell_ just happened?

In a split second, with one phrase, in which normally would have been fine and understandable and almost _expected_ , had broken whatever it was they had been building all night.

And Trini, _Trini_ , being the ever most patient and receptive person she knew, seeming to grasp the panic which she was feeling, understanding that in that moment, all she needed was for the shorter girl to agree and leave for only a small while, _nodded_.

Trini nodded, slowly, then quickly.

And Kim watched as the girl’s fingers unfurled and curled again, not knowing what to do or where to be put until braided hair easily whipped around a set of turning shoulders, and Trini slipped into the hallway towards where she knew the bathroom always stood.

And then she was gone.

And the room was empty.

And Kim, though she knew she should be able to breathe more easily now, _choked_.

On her words? Maybe.

But it was more on the pile of utter confusion and raw emotion that sat, twisting its way through her gut.

Because facing her fears? Showing her emotions? Dabbling in an experience and playing a game she never thought she was a part of before?

She couldn't do it.

She _couldn't_.

She was _terrified_.

_Trembling._

_Choking_ on the very fact, that what she wanted most in life, at this moment, she didn't know if she could grasp.

And the only one she could ever have to blame for that would be herself.

So, when faced with a situation she could not control, Kim did, what any other person would reasonably do.

She breathed.

Slowly.

And began to work on something she _could_ control. Something that would put her mind to rest and hopefully help her piece together the toil of emotions she had just witnessed in a mere five minutes. Something that would keep her busy until she was once again faced with a goddess disguised as a woman.

Kim cleaned.

Starting with the array of thrown clothes in her room to putting things back where they belonged.

She tidied and waited for Trini to return.

 

 

 

By the time the shorter girl had finished her shower, Kim's room didn't have a spec of misplaced _anything_.

And Trini, bless her soul, didn't mention a thing.

Didn't mention the spotless floors or the organized row of pens on her desk or the newly lined trash bin in the corner.

Didn't mention the awkward way that Kim sat on her bed, legs crossed and socked-feet free from shoes.

How her fingers played an endless game with each other as she could barely raise her eyes to meet the other girl’s.

Trini padded in, bare feet making light noises of contact with her wooden floor boards, which must be cold as _hell_ against bare skin, and quietly smiled in Kim’s direction.

The Yellow Ranger’s eyes were lit with, _something_ , Kim couldn't tell. But they were soft, as was her smile, and so Kim returned it and Trini’s grin grew ever bigger.

She noticed the oversized pajamas hanging off the girl’s frame (of course they were her’s), and she had to take a deep breath as her eyes slowly traveled from the plaid pajama bottoms, up to the loose fitting shirt and finally onto toned arms that were still using a towel to rid the last of the water from Trini’s hair.

“Showers free,” the girl kept smiling at her, it was almost a smirk, but it was understanding, and it reminded Kim to breathe and keep her nerves at bay.

Giving her fingers a rest, Kim bounced up to her heels and nodded as she quickly swept passed Trini and into the bathroom herself.

She didn't trust her lips to speak and she sure as _hell_ didn't trust her emotions or body language to do much better.

Because as soon as Trini had walked into the room.

In _her_ clothes.

Looking _warm_ , and _clean_ , and _inviting_.

All Kim had wanted to do was rip the towel from her hands and push her overly clothed body against the wall and disrupt the picture frames she had just straightened

 

 

 

She forgot her clothes.

Because _of course,_ she forgot her clothes.

In the rush of getting out of the room and trying to keep all of her unspoken words inside her, she had forgotten to grab the one thing she would actually need after the event of washing the day's activities away. And putting on the ones she had just taken off didn't sound very rejuvenating, especially since she’d tripped numerous times down here and they still had the stale scent of alcohol.

And what even was this? Some stereotypical teenage sitcom?

Where the dumb brunette does the obvious just to further the plot?

The shower had helped _a lot._

The stress and worries that had been underlining her actions all night had simply slipped away under the heat of the water. Kim was no longer tense. And the steam mixed with the actions of scrubbing the day's grime away had helped Kim slow down her thoughts and process what she was actually feeling.

Had helped her remember that it wasn't just anyone in her room, wasn't just some person who would play with her feelings and snap her entire mindset whenever they got bored or fed up.

It was Trini.

 _Trini_.

Sweet, and understanding, and quiet, and beautiful _Trini_.

So, her breathing had gone back to normal.

And her lips began to rest in a small smile again.

Until she stood at the door, wrapped in nothing but a towel, spare drips of water finding paths down her slowly cooling legs. With her heart beating out of her chest, which she could feel against her collarbone where one of her hands kept the towel in place.

Kim could hear the rumbling fan in the bathroom that sat only a couple rooms away, could still picture the cloudy mirror and taste the heavy air of steam.

And with thoughts slowly drifting out of her head, she reached out and took hold of the silver door handle that held her fate.

Trini lay lengthwise along the sheets of her bed, body turned and curled on her side under a mountain of blankets as she watched a movie off Kim’s laptop.

(Kim, being the sap she was, downloaded most of Trini’s favorites, and the girl always knew where to find them.)

It was a sight the Kim had seen time and time again. But in _her_ room, in _her_ bed, it was entirely different. Almost mind numbing.

It took a couple of moments for Trini to notice her presence, and when she did, when her head rose to smile at the figure in the doorway, when her eyes caught the unexpected attire, they both froze.

Kim's hand gripped the towel tighter as Trini went from shell shocked to awe, chocolate brown eyes sweeping up her body, almost looking shameful for the action as they met her's once more.

“Forgot my clothes,” she stuttered out, though it came out more powerful and whispered than expected.

Trini didn't react, but Kim could see a faint red tint begin to align her cheeks that seemed to power the Pink Ranger's motions even more.

She took her time finding her way around her room, looking through her dresser for an outfit as dark eyes followed her every movement. Kim's earlier fears seemed like child's play the longer Trini's eyes stayed on her body instead of the movie still playing quietly before her.

By the time Kim was dressed, Trini's eyes were glued to the screen. Eyes which had been kind enough to avert as she had gotten dressed.

(Though Kim wouldn't have minded if they hadn't.)

She froze for a second after it was all said and done. With her body facing Trini's back as she had walked around the bed, intending to join her inside its unbearably soft warmth. Kim could see Trini watching her, through the reflection of the dim computer screen.

Kim watched Trini, and Trini watched Kim, and all of a sudden it was as if she was stuck. Her bare feet now slightly glued to the cold hard floors (they would certainly make a faint peeling sound when she finally decided to move), Kim's confidence faded like the turning off of a light bulb.

A simple switch.

A quick change.

And now here she was, at ground zero, awaiting the final boss, as Billy would whenever he would show her the newest game he had gotten for his system.

With a breath, maybe her last, she pulled back the blanket and quickly shuffled inside.

The heat met her skin instantly, and she would have melted if the first touch of Trini’s skin against her’s hadn't done it already.

Their eyes had stayed locked in the reflected screen during her whole journey, and now that she was almost pressed against the other girls back, did Trini look away, unfocusing from the reflection and back onto the movie that played at hand.

It was like a release to Kim, a hand wrapped around her that finally let go and she felt her shoulders fall apart in an internal sigh.

It took only a few more seconds of shuffling until her hand slowly found its way around the other girl's waist and her front folded around Trini's back.

The touch was radiating.

Scorching.

_Burning._

But _god_ , did it feel like coming home.

Kim didn't really pay attention to the movie, she never did.

Instead, she took her time absorbing the other girl’s warmth, her presence. Tracing her silhouette with gentle eyes, playing with the fabric of her shirt, burying her nose in a head full of brunette waves.

(Now that it was dry, Trini’s hair was almost poofy with frizz, a fact that she would tease her for later.)

The movie’s low volume usually helped drown out her thoughts until the only thing she could focus on was the being before her, curled into her arms in an act of trust.

But tonight, the background noise wasn't helping, and Kim was painfully aware of everything happening around her. So much so, that when Trini gradually entwined their fingers, she almost jumped out of her skin.

With an erratic heartbeat, Kim watched as the girl in her arms took the hand wrapped around her stomach and began to weave their fingers together in a capricious pattern.

Her small hands going from lacing fingers to tracing small patterns on her palm, on the back of her hand, along her knuckles and around the tips of her fingers.

Kim was entranced with the ticklish yet gentle caress from the other girl.

Watching the fluid motion of it all, almost shivering from the lightness and care that was put into each movement.

She didn't even notice that the movie had ended. The screen sat before them black, with only the border of the window that had been open to play the film around it.

Without the constant noise, all the was left was their soft breaths, intermingled now as they had been wrapped around one another.

Trini kept up the motions for awhile until she slowly came to a pause, Kim watched their fingers still and her skin continued to buzz on with the aftershocks of the soft touches.

(If she had looked up at that moment, she would have caught Trini's stare in the reflection of the black computer screen.)

Their fingers stopped but their small intakes of breath persisted with the soft fluttering of one's hearts.

And all was quiet in the room.

All was calm.

And it wasn't _bad_ , nor _uncomfortable_.

It just _was_.

Until Trini shifted slightly, so that her head was turned more towards Kim, and she could see the outline of the shorter girl's nose and a pair of parted lips.

Kim leaned back, on instinct, only a minuscule amount, to allow Trini to fully turn and settle on her back. To settle beneath Kim as their eyes finally locked together again since before she climbed into bed.

The room was quiet.

And Trini’s eyes were _beautiful_ , and so full of _life._

Their hands stayed together, still resting against the Yellow Rangers stomach but now Kim's elbow was bent to accommodate the move.

Their fingers softly brushed one another and not once did they leave each other's lines of sight. Soft breaths now floated amongst each other as two girls lay almost atop one another, in search of something neither were quite sure of yet.

Kim moved the arm she rested against so that her hand could lay near Trini’s jaw, and ever so hesitantly, with all of the care she could bestow, she moved it forward so that her thumb began to trail along the strong-cut jawline of the girl below her.

Tracing the soft skin and taking in every tremble and shiver that came after.

Intercepting every reaction, every flicker of eyes, every intake of breath until she was _sure._

Until Kim was completely and utterly _sure._

And the room was quiet.

But it wasn't Kim who moved forward first.


	4. Blue Whales and Christmas Trees

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And it's here. Finally.
> 
> And I know this story jumps around in time a lot so I apologize, but bare with me.

You know that feeling… when everything just seems to be going your way? When all the little events in your life begin to line up, and everything you thought you couldn't do now seem to be done, and your life is stable and you have friends and even a small little family, and your room is clean, and work is going well or your grades are being kept up.

You know that feeling of utter serenity?

The feeling of peace, and ease. Feeling like you have time to breathe and have time to smile and have time to _be_.

And yet, at the same time, in the back of your mind, clouded by all the thoughts of happiness, way back, so — far — back… there's the unease.

Eating at your brain in little nibbles.

Turning every thought of giddiness into one of concern because what _if_.

And _when_.

When all of it ends, then what?

When the stability you have finally found yourself in, suddenly collapses. As the order of ease starts to crumble, puzzle pieces falling out of place, events starting to unalign and suddenly overlapping and suddenly colliding and suddenly everything you had carefully balanced in your hands turns into sand and it's simply _slipping_ , _slipping_ , _slipping_ through the cracks.

That’s what this feels like for Kimberly.

That's what it felt like.

When she had eyes only for a small girl beneath her, and her lungs were filled with more air than she thought she could ever hold. So much so, that she didn't think she could breathe back out.

When she could feel the smooth yet _burning_ skin of a girl who kept all her worries and concerns far, _far_ away.

She was — for the first time — _okay_.

But when the eyes she had idly been staring into began to move forward, her mind scrambled and her muscles froze. Until she couldn't stare at anything anymore because her eyes had impulsively closed when Trini moved close enough that their small outtakes of breath began to mix.

Kim couldn't see, but she could feel. She felt the bed dip by her arm as Trini sat up slowly, she felt the brush of something soft along her waist until she realized it was a _hand_ — _Trini’s hand_ — moving to pull her closer, and — _when had she_ _even_ _let go?_ — she could feel the brush of a nose against her own. Gentle, almost none existent, but there, and she felt herself gasp quietly when a pair of chapped lips brushed her own.

Trini's breath didn't smell like strawberry milkshakes as she had always imagined. Or like the cinnamon rolls she made on Saturday mornings, or of the cocoa they'd had in the kitchen, late into the night, when everyone else was asleep besides the crickets and the owls.

She smelled like mint, most likely from the toothpaste she had brushed her teeth with just earlier.

And she _tasted_ like beer. The cheap, gas-station beer from the corner market on seventh.

But Kim, being the diehard fool she was, didn't, give, a single, _fuck_.

Because she was tasting it on Trini's _tongue_.

Because Trini, small and delicate and angry and _sweet_ , Trini, had made the first move.

~

Kim doesn't remember it happening, she doesn't remember what she had been doing or why she had been doing it. She barely remembers where they were when it happened. But what she does remember.

Clear as day, almost five months after the locker incident.

With hearing so in tune she could have heard one of the mouse's squeak from beneath Zack’s front porch almost two miles away.

A sharp cry ring from the pit.

Cracked with pain, and so familiar that Kim was on her feet and dashing out of the Ranger’s break room faster than anyone thought possible. Leaving behind a card game she would never even recall and a startled Zach, still sitting with his hand mid-air, about to slam down an ace of spades to win the game.

Kim's feet were on fire, slamming against the hard, metal floors of the ship until the sleek surface turned into dirt. Small puffs arising from each foot fall as she raced across the pit, only stopping when she hit the ledge that dropped down into the Putty Arena. But that was only for a second.

Because what she saw made her throat close and her stomach tighten into an unwoundable knot.

Not more than ten feet below her, past the ragged shards of rock that jutted from the ledges surface, over the pebbles and loose sand, was Trini. Back down against the century old dirt, her hair caked in mud and sweat, sticking to her forehead and splayed out around her in almost a wind blown condition. Her arms were raised, shaking, from exertion more than fear, and her eyes were half shut, unfocused from the presence above her.

And she was covered in blood.

A _lot_ , of blood.

So much that Kim couldn't tell from where it was pouring from.

But in the mere three seconds she hesitated on that ledge, she took in the site of a crumpled Trini and a four hundred pound putty hovering above her, about to slam down with all the force it's rocky body could muster.

And she was not going to let that happen.

If you were to ask anyone else that day, Jason or Billy or even Zach, who had followed Kimberly out of the break room at a slightly slower pace, they would have said that what they saw that day was undeniable.

Almost unbelievable.

They would have said that Trini spawned the most massive Putty the pit had programmed and in ten seconds flat — it was nothing but a pile of rubble because of a girl with spirits so strong she could have stopped _anything_.

And she would have stopped _anything_. For the broken girl still lying in the dirt, tears unshed from pain — and maybe a little fear — but mostly from the sight of an actual goddess who had arrived just in time like always.

Trini didn't say much as Kimberly helped her out of the pit, didn't utter anything more than a few words until they had passed the boys still standing with jaws dropped on the outer rim of the small cliff’s ledge.

And it took awhile, a long while, for the girl to finally open up to Kim, to explain.

To retell how her mom had basically chewed her out and dragged her down until she felt like nothing more than a useless piece of trash. Like one of the wrappers from Krispy Kreme, all crumpled up and thrown into the gutters and unseen corners of Angel Grove.

Out of mind out of sight, because just like Trini, they didn't matter.

Kim helped carry most of the shorter girl's weight as they hobbled back to her place. And in a way, as she listened to Trini talk in a voice barely louder than a whisper, she imagined that she was carrying more than the girl's physical weight that trip as well.

She didn't dare interrupt once as Trini carried on, only holding her tongue and bringing the girl closer to her as each sentence and each phrase left the Yellow Ranger’s lips.

Because what Kim was hearing was eating away at her insides and was breaking her down word by word.

Trini continued, too, as they finally slipped through the threshold of Kimberly's empty house. A state it was found in more often than not — empty.

She explained how she'd had enough, how it was just all too much. _Everything_ was _too_ much.

And she needed to be alone, and she needed space, and she was angry and incoherent and she hadn't even realized the type of Putty she had spawned until it was too late.

And maybe, in a way, that had been on purpose.

But Kimberly hushed her at that, holding the shorter girl's cheek in her hand as the other, which had been wiping the dried blood from the girl's forehead with a damp rag, froze.

Kimberly didn't say anything, she still hadn't since they'd left the ship. She only held Trini’s face a little firmer and held a stare with her chocolate, quivering eyes. Speaking more though silence than she ever could with her tongue.

And Trini swallowed from the intensity, her fingers curling around the toilet seat she sat on, splintering its porcelain coating and cracking its plastic intake.

Trini's throat wobbled when she spoke again, when Kim had finally broken eye contact from where she sat crouched before her in the dim lit bathroom and had started to wipe away more of the blood.

And really, there actually hadn't been that much, but when Kimberly had been in a state of alarm, everything had seemed way more extreme than it had really been.

When the Putty spawned, and Trini had finally sobered up enough to realize what she'd done, it had been too late.

She tried, she really did, to take it out.

But it just wasn't enough, and she hadn't been _ready_.

So the first strike it had on her sent her flying, sent her crashing into the jagged walls, knocking the breath from her lungs and bruising more than one of her ribs. The second strike hadn't been much better, neither had the third, or the fourth — or the fifth.

And that's when Kim had found her, after the Putty had sent an uppercut into Trini's jaw, knocking her up into the air and back down, flat on her back, causing the blood to pour from her nose and from the cuts its knuckles and drawn as they raked across her face.

That's when ultimately, Kim had saved her.

And even though Trini knew that the grid would have stopped the Putty before it had actually laid waste to her, it still felt like she had been saved.

Like Trini owed her at least.

But again, Kim shook her head and held Trini's jaw, a little less firmly now that she knew how everything went down.

“You don't owe me a thing.”

“Kim-”

“Not a thing,” she held Trini's stare for longer than what would be normally considered necessary, but she wanted the shorter girl to _know_. To _understand_.

“You will _never_ owe me a thing Trin, _ever_. Everything I give and do for you is _for_ you and _only_ you. I expect nothing in return, okay?” She finished off her sentence by finally looking away from a set of eyes that were lining with tears.

She slowly lowered the now bloodied rag and watched as her fingers traced down Trini's jaw, eliciting small shutters from the girl as she continued them down her neck and across her collarbone until she firmly pressed her palm above where Kim believed her heart would be.

Or at least relative to, but schematics weren't necessary right now.

“You don't owe anyone _anything_ , alright? And you _especially_ do _not_ owe anything to your mother. You do not _owe_ her a perfect life, you do not _owe_ her perfect grades or the perfect friends, you do not _owe_ your family anything.” She kept her eyes on the hand that still sat against Trini's chest, she could feel the uneven breaths _shaking_ the body below it and she finally looked up into eyes that were shaking. But staying firm on where they were set.

Kim tried to not let the visible tracks of tears on the girl's face affect her but she was never great at acting.

So she took a breath and spoke quieter, because of it had been any louder she was sure to find herself in the same state as Trini, “but you know who you _do_ owe?”

Trini blinked and Kim pressed on.

“You owe _yourself_.”

When Trini looked confused at that Kim finally raised both hands to cup the shorter girl's face, which was now above her because she still sat, crouched on the floor.

“You owe yourself _forgiveness_ , and _love_ , and _reassurance_ because you are _amazing_ , Trini. You are _amazing_ and _beautiful_ and you do not deserve any of the shit that your family gives you.”

They were both shaking now but Trini was slowly trying to smile and so Kim joined in, even though her throat was hard and she was crying now too — and she needed to sniff before the snot ran out of her nose but she knew that would ruin the moment so she pushed on.

“Okay?”

And Trini nodded.

 

 

That night, Kim couldn't sleep, though.

She couldn't sleep because she couldn't take her eyes off the girl who lay next to her, fully passed out and tired from the day's events. Kim couldn't stop replaying the day, and the circumstances, and the what _if’s_ that always seemed to race through her mind at any given time.

Kim couldn't stop imagining Trini outside of the pit, where everything was more real and dangerous, she couldn't stop imagining if she had been a second later, if she had to watch the Putty crush Trini beneath its solid form

And yeah, they were Rangers.

But everything still _hurt_ , and it still _sucked_.

And Kim never wanted anything like that to happen to Trini.

And she knew that _that_ could never happen.

Because they were _Ranger’s_.

And someday, she knew a someday would come.

So she tried to steer her mind clear of _someday_ , because that was a giant and bottomless pit she didn't think she could ever drag herself out of.

“Could you stop shuffling?”

The voice was quiet, and gravely, and it broke Kim's train of thoughts so that each car went riding off the tracks into the abyss.

She focused back onto the body beside her and couldn’t help but crack a small smile at the glare being sent her way. Trini was facing her from under the covers, while one hand brought the blankets to above her nose so that all she could see were a set of sleep-glazed eyes, trying their hardest to look intimidating.

“Sorry,” her voice didn't fair much better but at least it wasn't sleep-coated.

“What's got you up so late?” Trini shifted to look at the clock that sat on her bedside table before turning back and lying down again. A little closer than last time so that she could rest her head on Kimberly's shoulder.

Kim was a mess for sleepy and cuddly Trini, so when she finally got her heart to calm she responded. Bringing her arm to wrap under Trini, pulling her closer and casually playing with the frizzy hairs sticking up from her mane of bedhead.

Trini sunk in closer but didn't break eye contact.

“Can't sleep.” She whispered it, as the close distance between them didn't allow for loud volumes.

Trini didn't say anything after that, only looking at her deeply and relaxing with each small trace of Kim's fingers, whenever they accidently brushed the girl's head.

Her eyes were alert though, and Kim could see her mind thinking behind her chocolate eyes, could see the gears turning and the balls rolling, slotting themselves into place until all the little lights on Trini's brain-board lit up in order.

“You know what helps me when I can't sleep?”

Kimberly hummed, more of in question than anything else, but mostly to answer the girl who was extremely close.

“Let me show you.”

And Kim shuddered at the words but nodded, her mind going to places they did not belong until Trini took a deep breath in and pulled away. Leaving Kim cold in bed as she slowly rose to her feet and pulled a pair of pajama bottoms on.

“You coming?”

 

 

“Hot chocolate?” Kim looked at Trini moving around her kitchen fluidly and had to stifle a laugh.

“Yes, _hot chocolate_ , something wrong with that?” Trini challenged and Kim smiled, shaking her head.

She watched as Trini gathered all of the ingredients, having to stand on her tiptoes to reach the saucepan — which Kim almost offered to help with but she knew that would only irritate the girl.

So she sat on the counter by the sink, idly watching the girl with a window open to the world behind her. Kim could hear the crickets hidden in the bushes, playing their songs of night. She listened to the breeze and the shuffle of leaves and the occasional hoot of an owl. If she turned around she knew she would be able to see the moon bright in the sky.

A crescent of a shape.

Not full, but still just as beautiful.

The kitchen was warm with the heat of a fire in the living rooms furnace, which she could see past the island which Trini worked at, but she still had slipped on an old gray sweater.

One that she had owned for years and still found comfort in even after it faded and not as thick as it used to be.

She curls herself into it now, wrapping her arms around her waist with the sleeves far past her hands.

A cocoon of warmth.

As she watched Trini work her magic on a pot of boiling milk and cocoa powder.

Kim had patched her up as much as she could, she knew that the wounds wouldn't last more than a day, but that didn't stop her from taking all precautions.

She had cleaned the girl's face of any blood, but the scratches that raked from her chin to under her eyes couldn't be wiped away. So she'd put small strips of surgical tape — don't ask why she had this, Trini had already tried, but was brushed off with something like overprotective parents — along the deeper cuts, keeping them in place so that they hopefully wouldn't scar.

Kim frowned as she watched the girl smile under the bruises and scrapes, like the giddiness she felt that night was far more powerful than a couple minor injuries. Kim didn't know how she did it, but she's decided to stop the worrying and finally relax, smiling when Trini glanced over her shoulder to catch her eye, and put her thoughts to rest.

Trini was fine.

It wasn't much later before a warm cup of sugary milk was slid into her welcoming palms. She smiled down at it, watching as three tiny marshmallows floated in its expanse of swirled foam.

Trini had dug around in the cupboard for five minutes before she produced a three year old bag of baby marshmallows with maybe seven left in its plastic. Kim let Trini have the most of them.

“This is a change of roles isn't it?”

Trini raised her brow at that as she took her hand back to wrap it around her own mug, until she took notice of the their positions and she smirked. “Yeah, don't get too used to it.”

“I would never,” Kim chided, but smiled slightly after a bit, “but now that I think about it-”

“Don't push your luck, Kimmie.” Trini sent her a playful glare so Kim sealed her lips and smiled into her mug because it wasn't often that Trini would use that nickname. And though Kim secretly adored it, she would never say.

After a while, when most of their cocoa was gone and Trini now sat beside Kim — well, more “in front of”, because Kim's kitchen window had a small divot with shelving for plants, but Kim's parents weren't a _plant_ family, so that small space was mostly used for curled-up sitting, which they were doing. Squeezed into its small space, Kim's legs crossed before her and Trini's knees to her chest, her feet sat between the cross of the Pink Rangers calves due to the cramped window sill but they made due.

Trini was looking out the window, her face illuminated by the glow of moonlight and Kim couldn't help but stare. Because this girl was beautiful and Kimberly was very, _very_ , gay.

Well bi, but you know what I mean.

Umbrella terms or whatever.

So Kim reached out again to brush one of the cuts along Trini's cheek because she just couldn't _help_ it.

And without turning from the window, the Yellow Ranger leaned into it, leaned into her touch which was warmer due to the hot mug in her hands.

And she smiled, softly, quietly, but Kim knew what that small grin meant. So she did as well.

After a couple minutes Trini finally turned to look at her, the shorter girl's hands were still wrapped around the red mug which rested on her bent knees.

It was covered in little Christmas trees, a present from Billy last week after the holiday.

“Are you okay?”

It was quiet, and nice, and Trini's smile grew just a little bit wider, “yeah.”

Kim finally withdrew her hand from the touch and she instantly missed the warmth, but she wrapped her fingers back around her own blue mug — it had a whale on it, and she'd bought it from a tourist shop on the west coast but she'd never told anyone that, and yet Trini always knew to give it to her.

“Thanks for the cocoa,” it was nearing three in the morning now and she could feel its warmth and sugar settling in her veins, relaxing her enough that if they didn't move soon she's sure to fall asleep.

“Anytime,” Trini smiled, and looked back out the window after her eyes had followed Kim's hand back to her mug. “It's what I make when I can't sleep at night, when all I can picture is Rita bursting back through my windows. When all I can do is picture her hurting you guys, _killing_ you guys, killing-” Trini's eyes glanced up at at Kim and she held her breath for the girl to continue.

But when she did the topic was different, “it's harder in my house though. With my parents I have to be quiet. And yet somehow my brothers must have sonic hearing because almost everytime I hear their little feet padding down the stairs after me and I have two little mongrels begging for a cup.”

“Please tell me you give them some,” Kim gasped jokingly and Trini smiled.

“Of course I do, I'm not a heathen,” she gently nudged Kim's legs with her feet that still sat between them and they giggled.

“My family might be shit, but I think those two boys will make it out okay.” Trini smiled sadly and Kim reached to wrap a hand around one of her knees.

“You will, too.”

She caught hold of chocolate eyes for a few moments before sighing and untangling her legs. Gently hopping down from the window and placing both of their mugs in the sink.

“It did the trick, I think I'm about as good as a dead weight right now,” Kim stood beside a Trini who still sat in the window. “You gonna join me?”

The Yellow Ranger softly smiled again, tonight seemed to be full of those, “in a bit, think I'm gonna enjoy the moon a little more.”

Kimberly saddened a little on the inside but didn't show it, only holding her smile and nodded, “alright then.”

And without much thought she leaned up and left a lingering kiss on the girl's cheek, only pulling away after her lips had stopped brushing the soft skin and the hesitance would have been awkward.

“Good night, Trin.”

“Night, Kimmie.”

~

Kim thinks about that night a lot. And all of the nights they shared after it that were similar.

And she tried to connect them to tonight.

To find what was different, what _changed_.

And she honestly doesn't know.

Doesn't think anything really _did_ change.

She thinks that these feelings were always there, that these actions and the _want_ had always been present, just not known.

And the only reason she knows _now_ is because Trini keeps pulling her closer.

And closer.

And _closer_.

A hand is in her hair before she can even think of it, before her lips even grazed Trini's. But now there's fingers tangling in her locks and she's taking a trembling lip between her own and she's getting tugged _closer_.

Kim's hand moves from Trini's jaw to trail down her neck, softly, as to not frighten, and over her shoulder and down the shorter girl's back so that _she_ can pull close, too.

So that they're nothing more than a pushing, pulling, _grasping_ mess. Because how long had they been hiding this?

How long had they been pushing it _down_ , deeper and _deeper_ until _now_.

When it's all finally come to light and all both of them can do is _take_.

A hand comes between them, it flattens itself along Kim's stomach and dips down until it's playing with the end of her night shirt and then it's _under_. The hand, warm and _soft_ , is under her shirt, slipping along her waist and around to the small of her back to hold her still.

To _feel_ her.

And Kim gasps and for the first time she's looking at Trini and Trini's _crying_.

Kim can see the tear tracks but the girl doesn't _look_ sad and then she realizes that _she's_ crying too, she can feel the small streams flowing down her face and so she does the only thing she can think about.

She brushes the hair out of Trini's face, strands that are sticking to tears and sweat and then Kim leans back in.

And Trini meets her.

And now it's _Kim_ pushing.

Pushing to get closer.

Pushing so that Trini finally breaks and lays down on her back and Kim finds enough courage in her to lift a leg and settle herself over Trini's hips. To straddle the girl who's still shaking and whose still smiling because Kim can _feel_ the smile on her lips.

And she giggles every time their teeth clash because they're both smiling and laughing and giggling and the girl beneath her is still warm.

And they're still crying.

But it's not because they're sad, or terrified, it's cause they're _relieved_.

It's because they've come _home_.

So Kim reaches down to touch more of Trini as well, because again, she just can't _help_ it. She _craves_ it.

But she hesitates as her fingers brush the end of Trini's shirt. And the girl must notice because soon there's a hand wrapping around her own and _guiding_ it down until it's pressed against the Yellow Rangers stomach.

And Kim shakes.

Because the girl is so _warm_ , and _real_.

And Trini breaks away so that they can both breathe, because in those couple of minutes she seemed to forgot that they needed to do that.

So now there's space, and they're smiling, and their faces are a mess.

And Trini's giggling at the fact that Kim's still shaking and her hand is frozen against the bare skin of the shorter girl's stomach.

So she pulls Kim down until their faces are buried in each other's necks, so that they can feel the laughter between them. So they can feel as one another catches their breath.

And it's _okay_.

Everything is _okay_.

And _perfect_.

And _warm_.

And neither would have it any other way.

Would want it any other way.

But they both fall asleep like that, with the lamp still on beside them and the computer screen still silently open.

And honestly, who cares.

Because they're _home_.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter? Hopefully, I keep extending it because damn it, I just can't stop writing
> 
>  
> 
> PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT, I LOVE THEM ALL, BIG OR SMALL

**Author's Note:**

> it's going somewhere i promise
> 
> (TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT PLEASE, SHOULD I CONTINUE?)


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